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Why do I resist spending money on my own needs?

May 17, 2016Linda AndersonFITNESS & WELLBEING, ME TIME2 Comments

Last week I became aware of something that really fascinated me. I became aware that even after all my years improving my own self care and working with Mums to improve theirs … I still have some very unhelpful thoughts about spending money on my own needs!

Unhelpful thoughts are one of the very first things we work on in my online program, 5 Minutes 4 Mum, because they are the first roadblock we face when we want to start spending time, energy and money on our own needs.

You might be aware that about 2 months ago I suffered I really bad “back seizure
which was so painful I couldn’t get out of bed myself, dress myself or even go to the toilet alone. It was totally out of the blue and I had never experienced anything like that. It turns out I have fractured vertebrae in my spine (from a long time ago) and that my body is no longer strong enough to compensate so it fell apart on me!

This is something I will have to manage for life and I am keen to never be in that much pain again. I was referred to a Personal Trainer who specializes in core fitness for women to get me back on track. The crazy thing was, after I met with her I could feel all kinds of resistance about saying “yes” even though I really liked her and what she does.


The resistance was all about the money.
Spending a decent sum of money of my own needs. This resistance made me so uncomfortable so I paid attention to my thoughts. I could hear myself saying:
“This is too much money to spend”
“Maybe you can just get fit and strong on your own?”
“I can’t possibly spend this money”
My logical brain listened to this and was saying “Are you nuts girl? Of course you can spend the money! Your long term well-being is priceless. The money is there. Spend it. You need to be fit and well”In my house my husband earns most of the money we have and although I know I contribute huge value to our family unit, money is not something I contribute. I realized that all my resistance came from an unhelpful thought that “it wasn’t my money to spend as I pleased”.

 

Have you ever had that feeling … that resistance?

I did end up saying “yes” and have started working with the Personal Trainer and am loving it. Being aware of my thought patterns helps me to shift them and create thoughts that serve me much better.

Is there something you are holding back from that you really want to do for yourself?  I say … “just do it” … you really truly are worth it!

Linda {RGB}

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: intentions, love, me time, self care

2 Comments. Leave new

Justine
May 22, 2016 8:08 am

Love this Linda, I generally put myself last but since my husband sent me off to the fantastic billabong retreat I’ve realised that while it does seem expensive it’s so what I need for my mental health. I’ll be going back again later this year.

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Linda Anderson
May 23, 2016 9:05 am

I am so happy to hear that your experience of going to Billabong has helped shift your mindset on spending money on your self care – yay! xx

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I have been feeling house bound for the last 2 wee I have been feeling house bound for the last 2 weeks recovering from my foot operation but I am able to drive now.
So when a beautiful friend suggested buying me a coffee and meeting me at the beach for some fresh air and a chat it was an immediate YES from me 💗
Thanks @emilykingpens ... that was so good for my soul.
#5minutes4mum
In our modern world we have neglected to support a In our modern world we have neglected to support and prepare a woman for the significant changes she will experience within herself when the mother is born. This transition from woman to mother is profound, and yet generations of women have been left to navigate this part of their journey alone.

It wasn't meant to be like this. We are supposed to gather. To share our wisdom with each other. To share our vulnerabilities. To take this journey hand in hand, to walk the path with others.

The doors to the 2021 Mama Rising Book Club have now opened and I can't wait to bring another small group of women together to explore their journey of motherhood together.

 

Thanks to Zoom we can be any where in the world together, and still gather.
We can rock our babies to sleep ... and still gather.
We can be in lockdown ... and still gather.

I am ready to gather .. are you?
It is time to gather. It is time to explore the ch It is time to gather.
It is time to explore the changes that motherhood has brought YOU, the woman.
It is time to feel supported.

Doors have opened for the 2021 Mama Rising Book Club. Link in bio.

It is time.

#mamarising #matrescence #5minutes4mum
Thank you @koukouleeretreats for providing such a Thank you @koukouleeretreats for providing such a beautiful space to gather mums & buns today for the Mama Rising: Birth of a Mother workshop. 
My 💗 is full tonight
Tomorrow I will be up bright and early (4.50am) fo Tomorrow I will be up bright and early (4.50am) for another great ocean swim with @nzoceanswim 
My island swim friends and I are catching a water taxi across to Auckland for the race.
I have been pretty quiet in the lead up to this swim because I wasnt sure I was going to be able to do it (grrr ... injury) but yesterday I decided I was still going to have a go, even if I just swim super slow and gentle.
You see, a beautiful soul I used to paddle with in Sydney was killed in an accident 2 weeks ago ... leaving behind young children and her wonderful husband. Tomorrow her funeral will be held in Sydney.
Tomorrow I choose to swim ... because I can. And I want to really feel gratitude for that fact and send love from the ocean across the ditch to all who will miss her. 💗🏊‍♀️💗
#lindaswims #gratitude
My first ever river swim. What a beautiful experie My first ever river swim. What a beautiful experience. So different to ocean swimming.
Fabulous event. I will definitely come back for this again.
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