I had a really interesting conversation with a client last week. It was all about tuning into the stories she has been telling herself that are not actually true but they have been defining her actions.
This client happens to be a successful manager in her workplace and Mum to a toddler who is not doing a lot of sleeping right now. She has been feeling run down and depleted. We started talking about what she needed to do to look after herself, start filling her energy reserves again.
During this conversation she mentioned to me that she noticed that at work she was really not looking after herself at all. She was not taking breaks, she was not drinking water and she was not eating proper lunches (chocolate is not lunch). Even though she knows that this actually contributes to her depletion she was not making an changes to this behavior.
So we began to explore why, and guess what we discovered? These behaviours were here way of “proving” some stories she was telling herself.
What were these stories?
- “I am too busy at work to take a break”
- “I am working so hard I can’t even manage to drink my water”
- “Not taking a break shows how dedicated I am to my role”
None of these stories are actually true, but these stories were driving the self -choices she was making. So by creating new stories she was able to see how she could actually be great at her job AND take a lunch break, drink her water and take better care of herself.
The stories we tell ourselves are very powerful. If we speak the words in our mind the stories become true … whether they actually are or not.
What kind of stories are you telling yourself? Perhaps you tell yourself stories like:
- “It is selfish to want time for myself. After all I wanted to be a mother”
- “I am not being a good Mum if I leave my baby with other people”
- “I have not time available for my own needs. It is impossible to fit anything else in”
These are all stories I have heard in my coaching. No matter what your stories are I ask you to consider the question – “What is these are not true? What if I chose a different story … what might that be?”
If you suspect you have stories that are stopping you from taking time for yourself, stopping you from feeling happy and inspired, or stopping you from living a life that makes you shine then I invite you to join me for 5 Minutes 4 Mum. Enrolments close tomorrow.
This program is so simple to take part in but so powerful. It has already changed the lives of over 100 Mums … are you ready to make change in yours?